Determined To Succeed

ZZZZZZZZZZ. Uh, oh…sorry. I fell asleep typing. I swear, I feel like I have no energy today. I know I better find some and quick because today is day one of two (possibly three) this week of martial arts class and I have a bag to kick and punch and a mat to make all sweaty.

Today is “Hump Day” and it feels like today’s hump is a huge one to get over. Today is a day tailor-made for coffee with a shot of five-hour energy boosters supplemented by the most energiest of energy bars. And yes, these things, particularly the coffee with five-hour booster, sound revolting.

I know I will find the energy, especially since I look forward to class as much as I do. But damn, I am just dragging today. It’s dreary outside and my body, particularly since I ate something that disagreed with me yesterday, is blah. I need energy and stat.

I do know a couple of things that give me energy. You guys, for starters. Knowing you are all out there is awesome and it keeps me going. Second, knowing that if I don’t keep up my energy to do a workout (and care about what I eat) I’d probably go back to the way I was and I certainly don’t want that. Not to mention if I don’t find energy I will be a useless slug on that mat today and I don’t want that either.

I was talking with a friend yesterday about my weight loss journey and it made me remember what my energy levels were like waaaaaaaaaay back then at 400 pounds…when it seemed to take the fuel the space shuttle uses to blast off just to get out of bed every day. That sucked. Being that heavy meant a lot more energy was required to do simple things like move. That sounded silly but you know what I mean. In other words, if I feel sluggish now imagine what I felt like to have no energy with the weight of another person to carry around.

ZZZZZZZZZZ. Oh sorry. I did it again…

I know energy and motivation are the hardest things to find sometimes and I am right there with ya. I so want to climb back into bed and sleep. But the day has started and I must get over this energy hump. That is my goal today. That and to have a little more cohesion in my mind (I hate when my mind is scattered and I’m struggling to string two sentences together…..ZZZZZZZZZZZ).

I know I wish for things sometimes but today I wish we could harness the energy output of children and inject that into our brains instead of coffee. We’d have the energy of ages if we could do that. Instead, I have to do my best to keep pulling the cord on the lawnmower motor that is my body/mind today and hope it starts up.

I’m sure it will. It better, or today’s going to be one long “Hump Day” fer sure. Like totally. So I apologize completely now for sounding so sleepy and tired today. I promise I will be more with it tomorrow.