Determined To Succeed

A plain milk chocolate Hershey bar. That was one of my mom, JoAnn’s, favorite treats.

Today is June 9th, the one-year anniversary of her passing. It is also the last of the firsts without her physically being present on Earth (you know, the first set of holidays, my first birthday, her first birthday, Mother’s Day, etc.) and you guys know I have been thinking about this day for quite some time now, sometimes with a bit of sadness and sometimes with a smile from a wonderful memory.

And sometimes, like today, with the strongest taste for a plain milk chocolate Hershey bar.

I have shared many things about my mom with you but I don’t think I’ve ever shared with you some of her favorite foods. The foods that made her happy. The foods that made us both heavy. Hell, even the foods we didn’t have sometimes. The foods we could (and couldn’t) afford. So today I am going to celebrate my mom’s life by talking about her favorite foods (and some of my own, too). It may not be the healthiest blog post I’ve ever done but it will be fun…and slightly mouth watering.

My mom, JoAnn Larson, was always fond of saying how much she loved to eat two things when she was pregnant with me – Chinese food, and chocolate and vanilla ice-cream. She used to eat so much ice-cream in fact that she was convinced that was why my tummy is slightly lighter on one side than the other (my birthmark – a chocolate ice-cream half and a vanilla half). I have to laugh at that one given my half-white/half-black bi-racial make-up. It always seemed corny but I could never disprove it, especially since I had physical proof.

She also loved her some beef chop suey.

When my mom was kicked out of her home in Cicero, Illinois for daring to date and bear the child of a black man (gasp, the drama) she moved to Hyde Park on Chicago’s South Side. This was a wonderful place because it was so mixed in terms of it’s population. It also had the best kick-ass Chinese food on the planet from Lung Wah Chop Suey. It was there she found her love for beef chop suey (and gave me mine). My mom had it when she was pregnant with me and treated us to it all the time (when we had the money) when I was growing up. It was our fast food of choice, over McDonald’s, Wendy’s and even Harold’s Chicken. An order of beef chop suey and three egg rolls is what we used to get. Damn, those were the days.

There was also Pat’s Pizza, the pizza joint right across the street from where we lived (and where my mom established credit for us during our leanest times). I don’t know how the name just came to me (I couldn’t remember the name for the longest time) but I am thankful it did (thanks for the reminder, ma). Even if we didn’t have money my mama made sure we, and I, ate and there were many a night when we had either meatball sandwiches or a large sausage pizza. Sure there were times we got sick of it (because we had it a lot) but damn it was good, and their pizza had such a distinctive taste that when I found Al’s Italian restaurant and Pizzeria one year ago as my mom lay in hospice I cried because it tasted exactly the same. I needed that taste of childhood at this time last year.

Then there was Valois, the cafeteria-style staple of Hyde Park. This was truly a place where the melting pot of Hyde Park’s eclectic community came to make soup. My mom loved their breakfast – sausage, two eggs over easy and potatoes with white bread toast – and their lunch – pot roast, with mashed potatoes and gravy and fruit Jello for dessert (there’s always room for Jello). On Saturday’s Valois had spaghetti and meat sauce. We used to get that with a side order of “mash and gravy” (don’t ask why we had potatoes with spaghetti. Just roll with it). And many a Thanksgiving was spent there, if not at my mom’s best friend, Rosalyn’s, house, having their “traditional” Thanksgiving dinner (turkey and all the trimmings). And did I tell you this place has grits for breakfast? Awesome!!!

My mama also loved her fish, and we visited the Cafe Enrico frequently to take advantage of their “all you can eat” fried perch dinner. Hell no, it wasn’t good for us but it was damned good and damned cheap, too. In later years, when she lived with me for a while on the City’s North Side, we got fried fish and fries from a place called the Fish Keg on Howard Street. Again, not healthy at all, but some damned good-tasting food.

Rosalyn was an awesome cook, too. She’d make us fried chicken, spaghetti, greens, corn bread, beans and rice…everything. She even fried up some chicken wings and made spaghetti one night when we were so broke all my mom had was bus fare to get back and forth to work. My mom called Rosalyn in what had to be a pride-breaking moment and asked if she could make us something to eat – and she did. Thank God for Rosalyn. That night we ate and didn’t go hungry, and it was also that night I firmly remember saying to myself I’d never EVER go that hungry again. That I’d help my mom any way I could understand how to make money stretch so we’d never have to feel that poor. That was when I began my truest understanding of how cold money could be. If you have it, great. But when you don’t have it…

…but this is not a sad talk. It’s a talk about food, and no food conversation about my mom would be complete without memtioning her love of fried chicken, speaking of chicken. We used to eat at Harold’s Chicken all the time, but her first love was Kentucky Fried Chicken. For as far back as I can remember she loved (and therefore I loved) their extra crispy chicken (until they messed it all up and made it spicy crispy. ick.), mashed potatoes and gravy (noticing a trend?) and cole slaw (which I am now sure contains a level of crack cocaine or other addictive narcotic). Even when she was diagnosed diabetic in her later years I used to bring her the occasional KFC meal and sit and enjoy it with her, and she loved every bite. her and the cat, that is.

On Sunday’s we used to get sweet rolls and other pastries from the fresh bakery that was perfectly placed between where we lived and the park we went to every week. We used to get danishes, and she’d get her coffee (extra cream, no sugar) and we’d enjoy decadent sweets while sitting in the park or reading the paper at home. It was in this park I scattered her ashes almost a year ago.

Lastly, my mom loved her Pepsi. Back in the day, pop could be purchased in actual glass bottles (still the best-tasting way to enjoy an ice-cold soda) and we used to save our pennies, nickles, dimes and quarters to be able to afford a case of “the good stuff.” We’d put it right in the fridge and, when it was cold, would pop open a bottle and enjoy it together. Or we’d sit outside on the benches a couple of blocks away and enjoy a cold one on a hot summer night. Those were awesome times. And even though I have switched and am now a Coke man, I will occasionally have a Pepsi and think of my mom. For old time’s sake.

Well, as they say times change and you can’t go home again. Lung Wah Chop Suey, Pat’s Pizza and the bakery no longer exist. When I spread her ashes almost a year ago I would have given anything to have at least an egg roll from Lung Wah just to ease the pain a bit. But no dice. Or maybe that’s a good thing. Harold’s is still just as active as ever and I do have it from time to way occasional time when I visit, and there is nothing like trying to find a table in the now-double-the-size Valois for a taste of breakfast served just the same way as when I was a kid.And if I ever get a hankerin’ for pizza, I’ll always (hopefully) have Al’s.

But no matter where I go in the U.S., no matter what time of day and no matter what convenience store in which I shop I can always have the first and best thing that reminds me most, culinarily speaking) of my 0f my sweet and beautiful mama…

…that simple, wonderful and amazing plain milk chocolate Hershey bar.

All you can eat.

All of us have heard of that offer and most of us have taken advantage of it at one time or another taken advantage of it either at office parties, salad bars or restaurants like Old Country Buffet. I have friends who think buffets are great and others who think buffets are nasty and to be avoided at all costs. But no matter which way you slice your ninth dinner roll, “all you can eat” is one of the biggest problems facing our country today particularly in our fight against obesity.

My first experiences with “all you can eat” came when I was a kid. My mom used to take me to a small place in Hyde Park called the Cafe Enrico on 53rd Street. From what I remember it was pretty cool and being a kid I thought it was the pinnacle of fine dining. And on Friday nights this treasure from my childhood served an “all you can eat” fried perch dinner. Living without much money meant this was a wonderful option for us to not only eat out but also eat well, and we took full advantage of it.

Again…

…and again…

…and again.

I remember one time in particular when I got three helpings of that delicious deep-fried perch. Hell, I even think I pissed off the waitress at the time because I remember seeming annoyed she had to keep bringing me slices of this culinary delight.

As I grew older, “all you can eat” took on different forms. I loved (LOVED) my Chinese food “all you can eat” buffets. Oh My God, are you kidding? They are delicious to me. Deep-fried orange/spice chicken, rice, beef with peppers – yummy. I could eat all day. But most notably in my life was Old Country Buffet. My mom loved eating at Old Country Buffet for the exact reasons I loved eating at Cafe Enrico. If you have ever been to an OCB you know they serve lots (AND I DO MEAN LOTS) of foods that are not that healthy for you. But it was cheap and mom liked it (and so did I) so we ate there again…

…and again…

…and again.

As we have become the heaviest nation in the world I am reminded of the “endless bowl of soup” parable I heard while attending One Day University recently in New York. Amherst professor Catherine Sanderson told us about the study of people who were given a magic soup bowl which was rigged from the bottom to always fill with soup no matter how much the consumer ate. At the end it was found that people using this “endless bowl of soup” at  two- to three-times as much as people whose bowls were allowed to empty. This proves that not only the attractiveness of food but also portion size influences eating decisions in our country.

And in this economy I can’t say I completely blame us for wanting a “bigger bang” for our buck.

But you guys know as well as I do quantity does NOT equate to quality.And just because you can have three or four plates of crap doesn’t mean you are eating well. It just means that we, as a country, are eating to excess.

My mom always did the best for me she could and I know that. I actually feel horrible writing about these times with my mom going to Friday night “all you can eat” perch nights because they are treasured memories with my her (and some Pac-Man games were thrown in there, too). However,  it is part of why I became an obese child. I am sure that part of what drives families to places like Old Country Buffet on a regular basis is that want to provide food for the entire family but it is also part of what makes families and children in this country obese as well. But we need to stop. Eating so much is slowly killing us. We are sacrificing eating healthy for sheer size and that is wrong. I am living proof of it. Or should I say my high blood pressure, sleep apnea and aching joints were proof of it.

If I do eat “all you can eat” these days it is at a salad bar and I only have two helpings at most. Not just because I get fuller faster now but because I give my brain enough time to register that I have eaten and I am getting full. I make the conscious decision to walk away and not go for a third or, mom help me, fourth plate. And I know that making smarter choices like these equates to one thing…

…I know I will be living a much longer life.

Am I here to tell you never to eat “all you can eat” ever again? Certainly not. There will always be people in your life who love the Old Country Buffets of the world (I love you, mama). But if and when you can use the money you’d spend and go to a grocery store. But fruits and vegetables. Make meals at home. Create a yummy soup that could last for days. Put yourself at the top of your priority list instead of your wallet.

By doing that you’ll not only help your waist line (and our collective American waistline) but you’ll be able to enjoy life’s many wonderful foods for many more years to come.