Determined To Succeed

Day one-hundred-sixty-three.

Bah! It is a dreary-ass day here in southern New Jersey. It’s chilly, freezing-rainy and just a crap day to do anything outside.

(psssssst…don’t tell my mind I am down in my weight. I am trying to distract him…)

Ugh! It is miserable outside and all it makes me want to do is curl up on the couch, turn on TV and be all warm and toasty watching something stupid.

(shhhhhh! Fact is, I am back down to 247.4 today and I am sick of going back up in my weight. Sooooooo, I am trying to convince my mind not to obsess about it so we can continue down this path. It seems that every time my mind thinks too hard we tend to go off-track and gain weight back.)

So what am I going to do today? Well…I do have some housework I need to do, have some errands and things I need to catch up on and some writing I need to do. You know the usual for me.

(All that stuff and I am going to drag me out into the cold, blah weather to workout because it does seem to be working.)

So I am going to do my best not to let this rainy and cold winter day go by without being productive.

(Yeah! Me, too. It’s already 18 days into 2011 and I am sick and tired of still carrying around this twenty extra pounds. More than that I am tired of my mind boo-hooing about it. “Oh, woe is me!” Well, screw that! There’s no way on this earth, even with eating better, that we can lose weight without working out. Sure, we have to get dressed and ready to hit the gym but the rewards are amazing. I am now up to doing 50-plus minutes on the elliptical plus tricep dips, push-ups, stretches and tummy crunches. What does that all mean? It means I am at least keeping my weight at bay. Now if I can only convince my mind to lay off on portion sizes we’d all be OK).

Well, I wish I had more to write today but I don’t. I fear I’m going to be boring today and that’s OK. Boring can be good, I guess.

(Yes, it can, especially when boring means getting me, myself and I back into a good exercise routine).

So have as good a day as you guys can today and I will check back in soon…

(And so will I…)

…to see how things are going.

(I second that!)

And from the both of us, if you made a new year’s resolution to lose weight and keep it off (it is on our – sorry, my – 40/40 list) then we absolutely will. But time’s a tickin’ and 2011 is now in full swing…

(…and I am keeping my fingers crossed I can give you more good news next time I check in with you guys. We are all in this together. Me included. It’s hard as crap to lose weight, especially when warm comfort foods like mashed potatoes, heavy soups, chilis, pot pies and generally unhealthy, heavy things sound really freaking good. But we will. We will, I promise. We just have to keep our heads out of it sometimes and not think about doing it. Just do it).

Day one-hundred-fifty-six.

Happy new week, my friends, and welcome to the second full week of 2011. As all of you know I live in southern New Jersey and, if you’ve kept up with the weather maps and forcasts recently, you know we here are expecting another 4″ – 8″ of snow. I know I am fond of saying this alot and throwing my Chicago-ness around, but you should see and feel the anxiety of others who live here, their “the sky is falling” mentality taking over over what will amount to less than a foot of snow.

When I was a kid, they only closed the Chicago Public Schools once (that I can remember). It was for the Blizzard of 1979 during which 16.5 inches of snow fell on January 13, 1979 alone, setting a new record for snow in one calendar day. By the end of January 14, 18.8 inches of snow had fallen. That blizzard was so powerful that it resulted in the election of Jane Byrne, the first and only woman so far to be elected mayor of Chicago. In a special election, she defeated Michael Bilandic, who took over after the death of Mayor Richard J.Daley, because of the city’s badly-planned-and-executed response to the snow.

Yes, Chicago received more than 10-inches of snow more than the most this area is expected to receive over the next 24 hours. Sigh. When I was in the store yesterday buying healthy stuff to eat like salad fixins, healthy lunchmeat and veggies I surveyed the crowds all gearing up for the threat of more snow. I even overheard that a local dentist’s office was calling patients to tell them they had already decided to close on Wednesday (our snow is expected to start tonight) in anticipation. Sigh again.

It’s all “milk and eggs” in this part of the country but I guess that’s just me. But what the hell does this have to do with my weight or weight loss? For starters, I am back up a pound-and-a-half which pisses me off to no end. Next, no matter what the snow fall is I am getting my rotundness to the gym to workout today, tomorrow and every day after no matter the amount of snow.  But I have to silently hide my origins and mask my shame as I ask the attendants at the gym if they will even be open tomorrow due to the (sigh) expected snowfall.

It’s O.K., though. Weighing in at 248.9 today I am more than happy to don my snow shoes (well, sneakers – or gym shoes as we call ‘em back home) and barrel through whatever snow falls to be able to get on the elliptical to burn off this extra poundage. One of the 40/40 I listed was to absolutely get back to my goal weight and I’m gonna do it, despite my over-zealous eating habits over the weekends.

In other words, I don’t go running to the store to buy my milk, eggs and bread afraid of what might be coming, I just deal with what is happening and what actually comes as best I can. That’s all any of us can do in this world – and in this world of weight loss.

Oh, and thanks to a good friend of mine I have a correction I’d like to make to last week’s blog.

Last week, as I told you guys about seeing bald eagles in the wild, I mistakenly called a grouping of multiple bald eagles a “flock.” This, apprently, is not the case. I actually saw a convocation of eagles. If they had been hawks I would have seen a cast of hawks. Or if those hawks were spiraling in flight they would have been a boil (funny thing to call a grouping – makes me think of soup, especially on cold winter days).  Also, owls are a parliament, crocodiles are a bask  and did you know that if you’ve got a group of frogs, it’s an ARMY!!

Awesome! See, every now and then you can learn something by reading my weight loss blog, even if it doesn’t necessarily pertain to weight loss.

Or maybe it’s just my way to mentally prepare going to the gym today?

Either way, have a great day, my peeps. Talk to you soon (hopefully lighter than I am today).

PS: A big birthday shout out goes out to my mom, JoAnn, who on January 9th, would have turned 72. Happy birthday, Mama. I love and miss you very much.

Day one-hundred-six.

OK. Let’s face it. I suck at watching myself as much as I should over the weekend. I just do. Although I go into the weekend with as much vim and vigor as I can muster, I simply don’t keep it up and I fall into that deadliest of traps…saying “I’ll do it tomorrow.” Although in my case that is the truth. Today, after I write this and get some things done around the house I am getting my fat ass up and heading to the gym. That will be good, especially since this week is the eat of eats, Thanksgiving.

I did end up exercising on Friday and again on Saturday, which is good. However, after a spectacular workout Saturday morning I was done, over, finished, fin, and I shouldn’t have been. I ate like a pig both days and I am mad at myself for doing so. The (semi) good news is that I only gained a pound-and-a-half. Woo-freaking-hoo! That has me thrilled beyond belief! But still that is no excuse for eating the way I did.

What did I do right? Well, my workouts kicked arse. I did my boxing, I did my half hour on the elliptical, I did weights, I did push-ups, tummy crunches and more. It was awesome. But it was cold as shit outside after when walking back to my car and sweat plus the cold equals the chills for hours after. But I felt great. I do wish, though, we could alter ourselves so as not _ NOT – get a taste for sweets during the day, and particularly during our watching of some movies or TV. Curse the tongue and its forever-hungry tastebuds for wanting chocolate chip cookies.

Sigh. All that being said, like I said, I did O.K. this weekend. I am going to do my best to get down to 238-point-something before Turkey Day, though. This way I can enjoy a bit of Thanksgiving. Although I will eat slowly, as promised so I can feel full after not eating so much. But that still leaves the question – why do I suck at the weekends so badly.

I think at least part of it has to deal with being in the mindset of the work week. The regular Monday through Friday part of things that drives me to be better. In other words, I lump work in with work and not working with the weekend. So. O.K. mental note, I need to stay in work(out) mode on weekends. Duely noted.

I think this week’s Determined To Succeed weight loss blogs are going to be short. Not because I’m trying to cheat anyone out of Nobel Prize-worthy material but because I need to get movin’ and remember thouse new rules and regulations I laid down for myself. I simply must lose this weight no matter how yummy things are and how weekendy things feel. That’s my job, quest, ambition and goal. And something more…

…something about which to be very thankful I can work toward any day of the year.

Day one-hundred-three.

It’s Friday and I am sitting at my desk contemplating things, and I guess when I say “contemplating” I really mean “worrying about” things. I am “contemplating” the weekend, Thanksgiving, my birthday, the holidays (Christmas) and New Year’s Eve – all of which have one thing in common, food. I know I am the master of my own destiny when it comes to food and crap but ’tis the season to be jolly and ’tis the season to eat. Eat. EAT!

I already have worries enough about weekends, those times where I know I will either eat more than I should, not workout as much as I should or both. I don’t know why I worry so much, either. I mean I will be working out, at least tomorrow (Saturday) and might have a go on Sunday, too, but in my mind it’s social time, I guess. Not to mention our weather is starting to get colder and our animalistic instincts take over so we eat to store up fat for the winter. Grrrrr. I will just have to stay good and keep repeating that to myself as I take deep breaths and head to the gym.

Then, coming this next week, is Thanksgiving, my favorite food holiday, and I know I will be weak for all the trimmings that turkey brings to the table. I will be – wait for it – gobbling it all up (insert moans for bad pun here) and I just have to take deep breaths and know two things: one, that no one is going to take that food from me and two, that I should eat my first plate slowly and wait to feel full before I possibly – POSSIBLY – go in for plate two. Again, deep DEEP breaths.

Following Thanksgiving (again, a moment of silence for what is sure to be the pound or two I gain) is my birthday, and not just any birthday – my 40th. The 19th anniversary of my 21st and I do plan to celebrate life. I just have to remember to take deep breaths before diving into any kind of food stuffs (although I am sure a drink or six might be involved somewhere along the line).

Finally, the holidays, Christmas and New Year’s Eve – more food, making merry and eating! Egads! No wonder so many of us make resolutions to lose weight in the new year. We simply just want to lose what we’ve gained over the holidays and the winter being all animalistic.

So, O.K. There it is, laid out before us like a road on a map I sure as hell don’t want to follow but have to. And it’s not that I dislike this time of year. I like it very, very much. I just am slowly – SLOWLY – creeping back down in my weight (I am at 240.8 today) and I don’t want that headway to be lost. That’s all. But foods of this time of year are so full of warm, comforty goodness. Dammit! What’s a fat guy like me to do?

Stop.

Close my eyes.

Take a deep breath.

That’s what I have to do and hopefully that breath will fill my mind with the fresh air it needs to think clearly and fill my tummy with goodness so I don’t just stuff my face.

First thing’s first…let’s get through this weekend. Deep breath time. Have a great weekend, everyone, and good luck.

Day ninety-five.

Why the hell are mashed potatoes so damned good? I mean, they are only boiled potatoes, some milk (or creamy salad dressing like garlic or ranch), butter and salt. That’s all. Not very complicated at all, but then again many masterpieces are simple especially with food. And damned if that particular comination, while awesome, is also deadly. Deadly in terms of not being able to exercise portion control, deadly in terms of calories and deadly in terms of putting you in a straight-up food coma like it did for me last night.

There I was last night, minding my own business, having a fist-sized portion of meat loaf (just the right size) and delicious peas and there they were, staring at me from their Corning Ware fortress planning their attack. There they sat just waiting for me to come to them because they knew I would. Their allies, butter and salt were waiting on either flank to close in on the attack. I fell for it and they sprang into action. I added a big heaping deliciously warm lot to my plate and added butter (well, I added “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter”) and salt. Oooooooooh, damn, were they delicious. But I shouldn’t have had that second helping…no matter how fun it is to eat mashed potatoes with peas. Ugh.

I am so damn lucky today because I only went up in my weight three ounces. I am at 239.7 and I must – MUST – get my ass to the gym today to workout before a couple of appointments this afternoon. For breakfast I had two small cinnamon rolls from Pillsbury (slightly stale) and I’m raring to go. But lurking in the refrigerator, gathering its forces for the inevitable attack is the dish of mashed potatoes, cold and dormant but waiting for the chance to be reheated.

Was all of that just a stupid, overly-dramatic way to say I shouldn’t have had two helpings of mashed potatoes last night because I ate too much and I fell asleep on my couch? Yes. But is it how I feel about some foods I am doing my best to control? Yes.

There are times in every food addict’s life when we all know and recognize what foods are danger foods. I have been doing great at ignoring and passing up the Chinese food lately. Not since that binge last month have I even looked at Chinese food, and I have been shopping and cooking at home consistently. It’s just that anything potato-ey is yummy goodness and I have to do my best to watch that, too. I may be eating at home but I can still set myself up for failure if I make things that are bad for me AND have them in unhealthy portions.

Today I am set in my ways and will be better. In fact the next time I write you I will have exercised AND eaten light, and that is the only deadly combination I want to face today, because it is on the good side of things. My side.

Day ninety-four.

Finally, a weight breakthrough! I checked the scale today and I am going down in my weight again. As of this morning I am 239.4. Woo-freaking-hoo! I am so excited I could…I could…workout! What an awesome way to start the day.

Although, my awesome day started with a, how shall I put it, strangely energized twelve-step meeting last night. I was so jazzed to get to the group and share last night but not everyone in the group shared my enthusiasm. In fact, one of the guys, “Bob,” shared that he didn’t want to be there. Plain and simple, and that was his entire share. I laughed and applauded his honesty after the meeting, however I was jazzed and this is why…

…Last week I went to see my therapist and, in our session, we got to talking about being caught in patterns of addiction and how thay can not only take over your life but also destabilize you as a person. I went into my past patterns and habits and how I am working every single day to change them and he said something to me I will never forget. he said, “Bill. I wake up every single day and say to myself that I’m not going to let anything take away my peace.” Those words floored me because there are two things at work. One, I now know what peace is and am living it day after day. Two, and most importantly, that I am the one with the control to continue living that peace. That, or the power to allow something to destroy that peace.

It doesn’t matter whether or not you are addicted to food, all addictions run the same. You can lie, cheat and shame your way into a situation that puts you on an endless treadmill of self-destructive patterns and believe me, that ain’t the good kind of treadmill that helps you lose weight. No, it’s the kind of wheel that just keeps turning, like a mouse does in its cage. You just keep spinning your wheels going nowhere fast.

Peace is such a fragile gift in this world and finally having a grasp of addiction and all its “evility” (yep, that’s right, I made up a word and I love it and will use it often to describe many things – and people) helps me maintain my peace, for it is I and I alone who is responsible for it. For example, I am the one who ultimately decides what I eat or not, how much I ingest and how much I go tyo the gym to workout to keep the weight off. It is just that simple. That is what so many of us don’t seem to grasp. It’s not up to, say, infomercials to sell us the latest weight loss suppliments, 5-Hour Energy drinks, equipment and videos that will somehow magically transform us. We must transform ourselves. We are the ones with that power and we control whether or not we have it or not.

Today, I finally am seeing results of me cooking and eating at home and it feels great. It really does.I am finally getting a hold of my life and turning it towards the positive. And each and every day I am doing my best to ensure that I maintain my peace and I do not allow it to slip from my grasp ever again. That goes for all aspects of my life, weight loss included. I do not want to buy anymore clothes unless thay are smaller…or for my upcoming 19th anniversary of my 21st birthday.

Have a great day, everyone.

Day ninety-three.

I can’t begin to tell you all the times Bill Ivory Larson wakes up on a given morning NOT feeling like doing something that particular day. Going to the store. Cleaning the house. Making a phone call to a creditor or business. Putting my nice warm and toasty feet on the cold, hard floor. It doesn’t matter. From time to time all of us face that point where we have to do something that we don’t want to do but have to do anyway.

Take for example working out, which for me has been more mental than anything lately. It’s not that I hate going to the gym. In fact, I love going and love sweating my ass off when I’m there. Sometimes, though, it’s purely because I HAVE TO GO that makes me not WANT to go. Know what I mean? It’s that I wish I didn’t HAVE to do it all the time. I wish I was one of those people who could (seemingly) eat whatever they want and not gain an ounce AND look like they just stepped out of a fashion magazine ad. But noooooooooo! I HAVE to go workout if I am going to merely keep my weight down. Bah! Bah, I say! The same goes for eating more nutritious foods, eating right and exercising portion control.

I know I should have a better mental attitude sometimes about weight loss. I absolutely do but I am human. But the thing that makes me know this is a story my sensei, Doug Shaffer, told me last week.

Doug told me the story of a kid he knew (you know a story will never end well when the words “kid” and “knew” crop up. Very foreboding, indeed) who was onloy twenty-one years old and died from an asthma attack. Poor guy. Went to a party, got plastered, went back to his place and zonked out. Somehow, he started having an attack and couldn’t get to his medicine (or was passed out while it was happening) and he died. he was found the next day by his girlfriend.

Just twenty-one, and with so much life ahead of him.

The reason I tell you that story today (and tell myself that story) is that we cannot sit on our butts and wait to feel like we WANT to do something. If there is something we have to do we should just go do it, for the love of God, and get it out of the way. I know I have never in my life been good at doing that because I was afraid of hurting someone’s feelings (that they wouldn’t like me anymore), or that there would be repercussions (like at my former job where you would just not want to open your mouth out of dread and a constant fear of being fired for daring to speak out). If we wait, if I wait, to do do something for when I WANT to do it I might be waiting a long time. Worse, I will be wasting time in the process, and I have wasted too much time on addictions to waste anymore of it on silly things that are only in my head.

Next month, I am going to celebrate being 40 years old and in the coming weeks I will tell you how I plan to celebrate my birthday all year long. But in the meantime I’m just going to think about how I lived almost 19 years longer than a kid who died simply because he couldn’t take a breath. I know exactly how that feels. I, too, had asthma so bad I couldn’t breathe at times. Hell, it even made me pass out once. I’ve lived 19 years longer and that means I SHOULD do something with that and because of that. That is purpose. That is drive. That is will.

I will because I must make the most of each and every day. No. Matter. What.

My friends, if there is something you don’t want to do today but know that you have to keep two things in mind. One, that you are not alone. There are so many others facing similar feelings about their own situations. Two, once you get it over with you will feel so much better and can move on to the things you WANT to do (and yes, that does include eating what you should and exercising to keep weight in check). That is what I will do today. Do the things I need to do to make the time to do what I want to do.

In honor of that kid who didn’t make it to see 22.

In honor of my mom, JoAnn Larson, so I do not disappoint her.

Most of all, for myself so I can be the man I’ve always wanted to be and now strive for every day. One of which my mom can be proud and I can say did the hard things even if he didn’t want to so that he, and those closest to him, could be happy in the long run.

Day eighty-one.

Ugh. I am fighting an “attack of the lazies.” You know what I’m talkin’ about (Willis). That “come hither” call you get from your couch or favorite chair to make yourself comfortable, turn on the boob tube and find something that allows you to sink down and waste the day watching this or that. But that’s exactly what it is, at least to me, a waste. Sure, are there days when laying back and enjoying are cool? You bet your ass. But when there is no bloody good damned reason for you to be laying there other than re-watching a movie you’ve seen a hundred times then it’s time to get up and get your move on.

Yesterday, I had a great mixed martial arts session with Sensei Doug and sweated my ass off. There’s nothing like a great workout to try to get the mind right. I also ate better. Not that I haven’t been trying but I seriously curtailed the Coke Zero and cut down on the chocolate (weening is a slow process). For my efforts I am down a half-pound today (239.4) and I’ll take it.

See, getting my move on helped.

One of my problems, though, is staying “in the zone” to workout. I wake up in the morning all full of energy to workout and I find I still have to convince myself to do it later on. I mean nothing really changes in the couple/few hours between waking up and having the time. It’s just that I get lazy. That’s the honest way to say it. I just get lazy sometimes and lose the want and desire to get my move on. But I know I can’t today. During my workout yesterday my right hip (and my hips in general) were so tight it was uncomfortable to do some of the yoga stretches after the workout. That’s not cool. So today when I hit the gym (AND I WILL BE HITTING THE GYM) I will focus on stretches in addition to other sweaty stuff so that my workouts are better…

…and so that I don’t feel like a slug.

I am human and fight that vicious cycle we all go through. I want to lose weight and I know I have to exercise and eat right doing it. But there are times I don’t feel like it (and get lazy), so my weight stays the same or goes up and I get all frustrated. It is a cycle and one I try to break, mainly because I recognize it when it happens. I just need to keep that energy up to make exercise happen. So today I’m getting my ass up, getting my move on and working out. And it’s not that I am feeling bad or am hurting that bad. I am just fighting that attack of the lazies I get every now and then. That’s all. So all I need to take is two miles on the elliptical and call myself in the morning.

The lazies may be a fun bunch to hang out with. They can always find SOMETHING on television to watch, even when crap is on. But today is nice (I am sure THE last over 70-degree day we will have in Jersey until next Spring so I need to get up, grab a shower and start the day keeping in mind that the more I move the more that numnber on the scale will go down.

You hear that, you lazies? I want that a helluva lot more than a re-re-re-re-re-run of, well, anything.

Day seventy-two.

Hey there, everybody. So sorry today’s blog post is so late. I am just now feeling myself after a major (although not my worst) allergy attack. Stupid dust particles. The irony is that I got my allergy attack cleaning. Ain’t that a kick in the pants. Oh well, you always have to crack a few eggs to make that omelette and I sure did yesterday. Vacuuming and deep rug cleaning felt awesome and it looks so much better – the fruits of labor far outweighing the sneezes.

So today I am up a pound-and-a-half. I don’t know how exactly that happened but it did. When I got on the scale today it read 238.7 and I was sooooooo not pleased. Hell, I even thought the sweat I was producing while cleaning would have taken care of some of that weight but I guess it didn’t. Oh well to that, too, I guess. I will re-lose it. I have no doubt. I will just get back on the elliptical.

Getting back to cleaning for a minute, though, I have to wonder why, once we clean, can’t things stay clean for a time. Ever notcie that? Like when we dust how it seems that the thing dusted just accumulates dust again? Hurmph. Or in weight loss, why can’t we enjoy our new lower weight for a time – kind of like that time I was a kid and wanted the sky to stay that gorgeous royal blue color. I know it doesn’t but once I get to a weight I wish we could stay there no matter what. Sigh.

When I was a kid I used to watch a TV show called “The Great Space Coaster.” It was an awesome show for 8-12 year olds and had educational messages in such an entertaining format. I know if I watched that show today I would be less than enchanted but it worked at the time. Anywho, there was an episode that dealt with science and the science of entropy – how everything in the universe tends towards disorder from order. What a crazy concept but it is so true. Even the cleanest of rooms can become a home for cobwebs and a sheet of dust thicker than, well, a sheet. Also, that dust can get into things like TVs, stereos and computers making them all eventually not perform well or, worst of all, break down. And that’s just from not using things.

This is why we always have to clean.

I thought about this as I was doing that deep rug cleaning and vacuuming. How nice it is to enjoy that clean and that I better enjoy it while it lasts. But not just that but also that if I want to keep enjoying it I have to keep cleaning – dusting, vacuuming and washing. That’s the only way.

Yep, you guessed it – that’s my weight loss message for today. Weight loss and its benefits are only permanent if we keep working at them, no matter how much we want to lose weight and then do nothing else as if we deserve to be there no matter what we eat or drink. And hey, don’t shoot the messenger. I’m just laying out the truth, a truth that I, myself, have to take every single day.

My place may be clean now but small little particles of dust have already come since last night and have landed on my clean spots, damn them. And so I go back to work today making sure I let them know who’s boss. And once that is done and the rug cleaner returned I will do that for the fat cells in my body. I will hit the gym, have a great workout and sweat my ass off so I can get rid of my fat the only way I know how – hard work.

I do not want my body to ever again tend toward the disorder of 400 pounds. I know I keep saying that but it is the absolute truth. But to get there I have to now finish the cleaning I did last night and crack the final eggs and make my cleanliness omelette. Once that’s done I can go and work on myself in the gym…thinking about all the clean and wonderful fruits I get to see when I get back home. Have a great day, everyone, and don’t let entropy come and get you.

Day sixty-five.

Damn Tom Selleck! I never thought I’d hear those words come out of my mouth (well, typed on my computer) but there they are. I know you must be asking why I am damning “Magnum P.I.” so I will tell you why. Because he is so damned convincing in his “drink orange juice” spiel that I did…a whole half-gallon of it last night. That’s right. I consumed an entire half-gallon of orange juice. Ugh. I feel so wasted.

My fascination with orange juice probablygoes back to me being a kid. My mom, JoAnn Larson, and I went to our local Walgreens which, back then, had a diner attached. Well, I thought I was the shit when she ordered coffee for herself and an “O.J. on the rocks” for me. Me, her son! She ordered what sounded so grown up and exotic that I was beside myself. Then, when I got it and realized it was orange juice on ice I loved it just the same, and have ever since. And yes, on “the rocks.”

So last night I satisfied my craving for Italian food (being that it was Columbus Day) with a delicious baked ziti and Italian sausage. It was absolutely delicious but when I looked in the fridge for something with which to wash it down I saw the “tower of power,” the unopened carton of orange juice. Knowing that I have something of an orange juice craving I promised myself I’d just have two glasses (two small glasses that is). However that went out of the window so fast I could barely see it. What started out as two quickly became six-and-a-half glasses (all with ice) and before I knew it I finished the container.

“DAMN!” I thought to myself as I angrily shoved the now-empty container into the trash bin. “I shouldn’t have had all that O.J.” I went to sulk on the couch, watch “The Event” and promptly fell asleep afterward. I was in a self-induced food coma and O.J. “drunk.” I woke up this morning a full pound over where I was yesterday and I am soooooooo not pleased. Not one bit.

Damn you, Tom Selleck.

O.K., I can’t really blame Magnum for my “drinking problem.” Despite the fact I’ve been doing really well staying away from regular Coca-Cola, orange juice will always be my downfall. I even looked up how much I drank. I consumed the entire carton of Minute Maid no pulp orange juice, which contains eight 8-ounce servings, each with 110 calories each. Yep, that means I drank 64-ounces of orange juice and 880 calories – JUST BY DRINKING. Grrrrrrr.

I know I know better but it does just go to show (and show me) we need to watch the calories we drink. I am still in shock over the whole thing. Of course there are things in the world that are so much worse that drinking that much O.J., but watching my weight and calories and what I ingest is critical to not only my health but my future. It is at once both health-related and economic (since I didn’t spread out that purchase over several meals as I should have). And can I just mention my weight again…

Well, as I am always fond of saying (and believing) today is another day and a chance to right the wrongs of yesterday. Addictive patterns run deep in me, that much is for sure, especially with food and drink and I am the first to admit I am addicted to food and not in very good ways. But I will pick myself up again and keep moving forward. I will get to the gym today and workout. I will NOT consume as much as I did yesterday. I will be better. I have to be, especially since the guy who originally was chosen to play Indiana Jones is telling me to drink 100% pure orange juice…

…with credentials like that, his smoking of cigars aside for the moment, how could “Magnum P.I.”  be wrong?