Tag: review
Run For Your Life From “Daybreakers”
by Bill Ivory Larson on Jan.19, 2010, under Bill's Movie Reviews
Run For Your Life From “Daybreakers” – ½ Bucket of Popcorn out of Four
Oh man. I am shaking my head right now trying to figure out how to sink my teeth into this review of “Daybreakers.” I always jump at the chance to see vampire flicks but after seeing this one I ran from the theater like a bat out of hell.
In the year 2019, a plague has transformed almost every human into vampires with the remainders on the run from companies who harvest their blood to sell to the population.. Faced with a dwindling blood supply (you can only drain humans so much, after all), the fractured dominant race plots their very survival as those who go “blood deprived” start to devolve and attack their own mutating into horrible creatures known as “subsiders.” Meanwhile, a researcher (played by Ethan Hawke – what the hell happened to him!) works with a covert band of vamps and humans to find a way to save human and vampire kind.
Where do I begin with this mess of a movie? I’d thought this movie would have some bite to it. I mean it’s got a decent cast (Dafoe, Hawke and Neill) and I totally eat up vampire flicks (except for the insipid tween-age “Twilight” movie series that is) but what in God’s name were they thinking with this script? This movie is the worst I’ve seen in a long time. Did the filmmakers think we’d all be drunk or something seeing this boring, vapid vampire flick? “How much better on paper this must have looked and sounded” is what I’m thinking. How else could they get those guys in the same movie that steals blatently from good movies like “The Matrix,” “I Am Legend,” “Zombieland” and more.
You really wanna know how bad this movie was? I almost walked out, and I never do that. Ever. There are two reasons I am giving it ½ star (or ¼ star per reason). 1) because of the “cure” they find. It worked enough for me when almost nothing else did. 2) because it is not the worst movie I’ve ever seen, or even saw last year. That honor goes to a very little known flick I purchased on DVD called “Immortal” – a part bad CGI, part live action all craptastic movie featuring the Egyptian god Horus, a Blade Runner rip-off society and Charlotte Rampling. It was a zero-bucket-of-popcorn flick.
As for “Daybreakers,” run back to your coffins and hide from this one. Even when it starts showing up for free on cable. I felt drained after watching this waste of an hour-and-a-half of my life.
And to the filmmakers – “fangs for nuthin’” guys. Your movie – wait for it – sucks.
Rated R for strong bloody violence, language and brief nudity
Runtime: 98 min
Ethan Hawke … Edward Dalton
Sam Neill … Charles Bromley
Willem Dafoe … Lionel ‘Elvis’ Cormac
Claudia Karvan … Audrey Bennett
“Twilight Saga: New Moon” Has Some Bite To It
by Bill Ivory Larson on Nov.30, 2009, under Bill's Movie Reviews
Folks. Gather ‘round the computer screen. Don’t be afraid. I won’t bite (wink). What I’m about to say I don’t want to say too loudly. I’ll wait for you. Grab a drink, some healthy munchies. Ok, are you ready? I’m going to whisper. Here it comes.
I kind of liked “Twilight Saga: New Moon.”
I am in no way, shape or form a “Twilighter” or moonie or whatever the hell the fans of the books and/or movies call themselves. But I was finding myself actually liking more of “New Moon” than I thought I would.
Better to review them with, my dear.
After Bella recovers from the vampire attack that almost claimed her life in the first book/movie, she looks to celebrate her birthday with Edward and his family. However, a minor accident during the festivities results in Bella’s blood being shed, a sight that proves too intense for the Cullens, who decide to leave the town of Forks, Washington for Bella and Edward’s sake. Initially heartbroken, Bella finds a form of comfort in reckless living, as well as an even-closer friendship with Jacob Black.
I haven’t read the books (oh darn) so I am keeping myself “pure” by just seeing the films. I will go on record as saying that the first “Twilight” movie was silly dreck. I laughed out loud at some of the scenes in “Twilight” because the looks given by characters, bad acting and dialogue and cheesiness overcame the story and after a while I just didn’t care. In “New Moon” there is still some of each, particularly from the wooden Robert Pattinson as Edward. But what you can sink your teeth into (OK, I couldn’t resist) is the love triangle that happens when heroin-chic Edward flies the coop and leave his beautiful Swan in the paws of burgeoning werewolf Jacob (Taylor Lautner). Take away the vampire/werewolf plot and you actually have a decent love/unrequited love story reasonably well-acted that you can care about.
As Jacob, Lautner is good and I felt for his character hopelessly drawn to Bella, allowing himself to be used by her as a way to “get over” Edward. You just want him to stand up and say “Are you nuts? Stop using me and let me go!” And for me to want him to say that means I was sucked into (pun intended) the story.
Of course, Edward comes back…blah, blah and we see him trying (operative word TRYING) to be all swoony/lovey but his slow-motion walks and brooding, drugged-out looks end up being more comical than romantic. And as Bella, Kristen Stweart is decent at playing the girl who the boys fawn over although I see no reason why they do. She’s an indecisive user who at 18 thinks she knows what she wants not just for the rest of her life but all eternity.
But don’t all self-entitled teenagers these days.
Let’s just say this. With a soundtrack that’s pretty cool and a half-way decent love triangle “New Moon,” while nothing to really howl for isn’t a half-bad way to spend a rainy day at the movies.
Christina Jastrzembska … Gran / Bella
Robert Pattinson … Edward Cullen
Jackson Rathbone … Jasper Hale
Rated PG-13 for some violence and action.
Runtime: 130 min
Blood-filled “Ninja Assassin” a Wild Fun Time at the Movies
by Bill Ivory Larson on Nov.30, 2009, under Bill's Movie Reviews
From time to time you need to cleanse the movie-going palate. Any steady diet of romantic comedies or dramas needs to have that balanced with something else or life in a movie theater can get pretty boring pretty quick.
“Ninja Assassin” is just that palate cleanser.
This is a movie that absolutely makes no apologies for the blatant rip-offs it employs or for the copious amount of gratuitous violence and blood it spills forth (OK, that was cheap, I know). But I totally respect a movie that simply is what it is – a fun, wild, ninja-action thrill ride that is both fun and entertaining.
I won’t spend too much time going into the plot. What’s the point? A young ninja turns his back on the “orphanage” (a.k.a. ninja training academy) that raised him, leading to a confrontation with fellow ninjas from the school while helping detectives figure out worldwide assassinations seemingly carried out by – you guessed it – ninjas.
Does this sound absolutely ridiculous? Yes. Are the plot situations themselves merely set-ups for action scene after action scene. Yes.
Is this movie fun? Hell yes.
I counted four movies, four, that “Ninja Assassin” blatantly rips off. The first (best, and what should be only) “Highlander,” “The Terminator,” “Kill Bill” and “The Matrix.” In fact, some shots are so close they should be shown in film school to prove there really aren’t any original ideas running around Hollywood anymore. But I dig each of those movies and when they’re mashed-up like they are here it was totally worth the dough I shelled out to see it.
I liked this movie so much I hope there’s a sequel. I’m not giving anything away by saying that especially in a cinematic world where you can kill off the lead bad guy (i.e. “Saw’s” Jigsaw) in part three and still be using him in part six.
The acting in some scenes is, frankly, mediocre. The subplot about the political assassinations is almost unnecessary. What holds this film together is its central revenge story and the lead character played by international action star Rain. His performance is so subtle but yet so explosive that I want to see his character more either in sequels or have him pop up in other flicks. You see what makes him fight and understand why he chooses not to unless provoked.
But please don’t provoke this guy. His nice guy doesn’t EVER finish last
Oh, by the way. I TOTALLY want to introduce his character to “Kill Bill’s” The Bride. Those two with their blade-swinging choreography, charm and body counts would make for a great action movie duo. The Astaire-Rodgers of the new-world matinee.
PS: For God’s sake, please do not take children to see it. I know kids these days seem a lot more desensitized to violence and “it’s OK.” But this film really is for adults. Let the kids see “Twilight: New Moon” or something else instead. It’ll be worth the wait until they’re 18.
Sung Kang…Hollywood
Randall Duk Kim…Tattoo Master
Jonathan Chan-Pensley…Yakuza Henchman
Yuki Iwamoto…Yakuza Couch
Ill-Young Kim …Yakuza Mohawk
Ben Miles…Maslow
Naomie Harris …Mika
Rain…Raizo
Stephen Marcus…Kingpin
Linh Dan Pham…Pretty Ninja
Yu Fang… Laundromat Manager
Adriana Altaras…Landlady
Shô Kosugi…Ozunu
Kylie Goldstein…Young Kiriko (as Kylie Liya Goldstein)
Yoon Sungwoong … Young Raizo
Total Running Time: 99 min
Rated R for strong bloody stylized violence throughout, and language.
