Determined To Succeed

As you guys know I am in New York attending a conference on all things website. I won’t bore you with the same details with which I was almost bored to sleep (literally – I had to get coffee during one of the panels or it would have been snooze city) but overall it was a great day for day one and I did end up learning tons about stuff so that I could enhance my own weight loss website. That’s the only way I can put it because my brain is mush.

However, the biggest and best thing I learned yesterday didn’t come from one of the speakers. It came from a mom (I won’t say her name for fear she’d be embarrassed). I ran into her while waiting on the last session of the day to begin. While we both waited I started talking to her about what I do and it was as if her eyes lit up. She told me all about her son and how her son, who is only twelve, has already felt the acute sting of what it’s like to be a heavy child.

Even though he’s not obese, he was chubby and his friends and schoolmates constantly let him know in the ever-so-brutally-honest way that only children can. He was the object of jokes and they made him sad, hurt and, worst of all, alone. I so remember what it was like being an obese kid. Even though I should have fit into clothes designated for kids my age I had to get the next size or two up from that just to find stuff that fit. My “friends” made fun of my stomach and my lack of physical ability because of it. I was called “fatty,” “Buffalo Bill” (that was a popular one), “Big Bill…” You name it. And I used to go home and cry about it…then eat to try to get rid of the pain.

I know exactly what this kid is going through because I went through it myself being an overweight child. Then, as I grew into adulthood it went from bad to worse. The brutal honesty of children gave way to the absolute meanness of high schoolers. Man, they were merciless, especially at a time when I was becoming a young adult, trying to attract girls and trying to maintain what little I had left of a positive body image. That is how my sense of humor became so honed. I needed it in both grammar and high schools just to deflect that pain away from me – even if it meant being the butt of my own jokes about myself. Laughter was the only way I could hide that pain. And believe me there was a lot of pain.

As an adult the insults became less but only because adults (well, most adults) learn to mask insults. But nothing, absolutely nothing, can take the look out of someone’s eyes. You can tell what a person is thinking just by looking at them. Like when I boarded a plane…or entered a restaurant.

When I heard this mom’s story all I wanted to do was tell her son it’s OK and that he is absolutely not (I repeat NOT) alone, which is why I, thanks to her son’s story and my newly-found knowledge from yesterdays brain-scrambler series of talks and seminars, am going to devote an upcoming portion of my website to children and weight loss. I know now there are so many of us “fat kids” out there who need a place to go to know they are safe. That’s all, safe. Safe from the barbs and stings of words that cut like swords. Safe from even being made fun of because they’re crying. I used to do that, too. But no more. Thanks in part to Michelle Obama’s “Let’s Move” initiative childhood obesity is getting the attention it deserves, shining a light on a problem that’s been festering for decades.

This mom told me that her son has worked hard to get his own extra weight off, which he has done, but that he still says “Mom, I’m fat” when he slips or has a bad eating day (sound familiar?). But help is on the way, kid. Help is on the way. Just know there are many of us out there who has not just survived being pre-teens and teenagers, a feat in-and-of itself. We also have taken the weight off to become healthier and happier people armed with a new way of living so we never see those pounds again.

You can do it, kid. As much as I have faith the adults reading this blog will reach their weight loss goal weights, I have faith in you, too. So keep watching this site. Because through it all, us adults and you kids alike, will get to our weight loss goals. We absolutely will and we will do it together.